Parents, let’s just put it out there. Sometimes we are so focused on getting our kids’ needs met (and justifiably so!) that we forget that there are two or three other points of view out there. Our kids can be disruptive to other students.
I don’t know how many of you have been on the flip side of this coin, but I have. There were many incidents in my son’s elementary classroom, and he’d come home and tell me about the disruptive behavior. And, he’d tell me how he was either forced to stay out in the pod area (common area) missing teaching time, or how it made him late to lunch or something else.
Look, no one gives kids the benefit of the doubt more than I do. Honestly–I do it to a fault because I feel like I have to overcompensate because the rest of society is so unforgiving for our kids.
But we’re not doing anyone any favors by denying that this exists or trying to solve it. Especially our kids. Disruptive behavior at school is not just disruptive–it’s annoying and further socially ostracizes students who are usually already socially challenged.
What is Disruptive Classroom Behavior?
Oh, where do I start with this one? Classroom behavior can be disruptive in so many ways, and let me tell you, schools love to slap a “behavior problem” label on a kid without ever digging into the why. But before we dive into that mess, let’s look at some common examples of disruptive behaviors you might hear about:
1. Talking Out of Turn
This one’s a classic. It could be your child constantly calling out during class or chatting with friends when they’re supposed to be listening. Teachers typically find this distracting, but before jumping to conclusions, ask yourself: Is the child engaging because they’re curious or because they’re bored? A lot of kids get labeled as disruptive when they’re actually not being challenged enough. Or, maybe they just don’t have the self-regulation skills yet to wait for their turn.
2. Leaving Their Seat
Some kids just can’t sit still, especially if they have ADHD or sensory processing issues. If a child is getting up and wandering around, it might be seen as a lack of focus or defiance, but in reality, their body might need to move. Movement breaks could fix this, but you know what schools often do? They take away recess. 🤦♀️ Yeah, because sitting a child still even longer is going to help…
3. Refusal to Do Work
Now, this one gets misinterpreted all the time. Your child refusing to do their work might seem like defiance on the surface, but it often masks something deeper—like frustration, anxiety, or simply not understanding the material. Instead of asking why the child won’t do the work, many teachers just assume it’s bad behavior. Spoiler: it’s rarely just “bad behavior.”
4. Making Noises or Fidgeting
Some kids hum, tap their pencil, or fidget constantly. While these behaviors can distract others, they’re often a coping mechanism for the child. Sensory overload, anxiety, or even just boredom can trigger these behaviors. The key here is to find out why the child is doing it and give them a better outlet for those needs.
5. Aggression or Tantrums
This one is more extreme, but it happens. If a child is having meltdowns or outbursts in the classroom, it’s not just about them being “bad.” They’re trying to communicate something—whether it’s frustration, overstimulation, or emotional overwhelm. Unfortunately, schools often respond to aggression with punishment, like sending the child home or into isolation, rather than digging into the underlying issues.
Disruptive Students in the Classroom
Ah, the classic question: “But how does this affect the other kids?” I swear, this is the go-to line for schools when they don’t want to deal with a child’s behavior. But, let’s be real.
Yes, disruptive behaviors can affect other kids in the class—no one’s denying that. But here’s the thing: we can address a child’s needs without making them the scapegoat for everything that goes wrong in the classroom. Let’s dive into what this looks like.
1. Distractions in Learning
Sure, if your child is constantly calling out or moving around the room, it might distract other kids from focusing on their work. It’s not ideal. But instead of blaming your child, we need to ask: How can we support both your child and the rest of the class? Sometimes, small accommodations—like fidgets, visual schedules, or sensory breaks—can help the child who’s struggling and reduce distractions for everyone else.
2. Social Impact
Here’s where it can get tricky. Sometimes other kids don’t understand why a child is behaving a certain way. They might get frustrated or avoid the child altogether, which can lead to isolation. But this is an opportunity for schools to educate other students about empathy, inclusion, and understanding differences. It’s not about making excuses for bad behavior, but about teaching kindness and patience. And yes, this takes some work from the teachers and staff, but isn’t that part of their job?
3. Setting a Classroom Tone
Some teachers will argue that if one child is “disruptive,” it throws off the whole classroom dynamic. And sure, if a child is having frequent meltdowns or outbursts, it can make it harder to maintain a peaceful classroom. But again, this is why addressing the root of the behavior is key. When the child’s needs are met—whether that’s through behavioral interventions, sensory supports, or academic adjustments—the disruptions often decrease. Plus, when schools respond in a supportive way, it shows all the kids that everyone’s needs matter.
4. Learning Patience and Adaptability
This is something a lot of people forget to mention. Having a classmate with challenging behaviors can actually teach other kids some important life skills—like patience, adaptability, and compassion. Not everything is going to run perfectly, and not every classmate is going to behave in a cookie-cutter way. But that’s real life. The other kids learn to roll with it, and sometimes, they even become advocates for their peers.
So yes, disruptive behaviors can affect the other kids. But we shouldn’t jump to the conclusion that these behaviors are harmful or unmanageable. With the right supports in place, the classroom can function smoothly. And instead of viewing a child as a “disruption,” we can see it as a chance to create a more inclusive, understanding environment for everyone.
How to Manage Disruptive Students
Oh, I love this one because, honestly, teachers are often thrown into classrooms with little to no training on how to handle disruptive behavior. They’re told to just “make it work,” and that’s a setup for frustration—for both the teacher and the student. But with the right strategies, teachers can manage disruptive behaviors without it becoming a battle of wills. Here are some tips to help them out:
1. Build Relationships First
Before anything else, the teacher needs to connect with the student. I know, I know—easier said than done. But kids are way more likely to respond positively if they feel respected and understood. Spend time getting to know the child’s interests, strengths, and struggles. Even just a few minutes of positive one-on-one attention can go a long way. When kids feel seen and heard, they’re more likely to cooperate.
2. Establish Clear Expectations and Routines
This is a big one. Kids thrive on consistency, especially those with executive functioning or behavioral challenges. Teachers should establish clear, predictable routines and post them where kids can see them. Visual schedules are gold for kids who struggle with transitions. Also, be crystal clear about classroom rules and review them often. If a student knows exactly what’s expected and what will happen if they’re struggling, it reduces anxiety and helps them stay on track.
3. Use Positive Reinforcement (and Lots of It!)
Let’s face it, kids with disruptive behaviors are used to hearing about what they’re doing wrong. It’s exhausting for them—and it doesn’t work. Teachers should flip the script and focus on catching the child doing things right. Positive reinforcement can be as simple as verbal praise like, “Hey, I noticed you stayed in your seat for the last five minutes—great job!” The more a child feels recognized for their efforts, the more they’ll want to repeat the behavior. And here’s the trick: reinforce the effort, not just the outcome. Celebrate progress, not perfection.
4. Provide Breaks and Movement
Some kids literally cannot sit still for long periods—it’s not defiance, it’s biology. Build in movement breaks, either for the whole class or just for the child who needs it. Even a quick trip to the water fountain or a few minutes to stand and stretch can reset a child’s focus. For kids with sensory needs, let them use fidgets or stand at their desk if sitting is too much.
5. Incorporate Choice
Giving students a sense of control over their environment can drastically reduce disruptive behavior. Offer choices wherever possible—whether it’s choosing which task to work on first, picking a seating option, or deciding how they want to demonstrate what they’ve learned (e.g., a drawing vs. a written paragraph). When students feel they have some agency, they’re less likely to act out as a form of rebellion.
6. Stay Calm and Consistent
I know it’s hard when you’ve got 25 other kids to manage, but staying calm is critical. When teachers respond with frustration or anger, it escalates the situation. The best way to handle disruptions is with calm, consistent responses. If a student breaks a rule, enforce the consequence without a lot of emotion. Keep your voice level, and don’t get drawn into power struggles. Consistency is key—if kids know that misbehavior will always lead to the same outcome, they’re less likely to test the boundaries.
7. Use Proactive, Not Reactive, Strategies
Good behavior management is about preventing issues before they happen. This means paying attention to the times and situations when the child tends to struggle and making adjustments ahead of time. Is the child always disruptive during math because they’re frustrated? Offer extra support or break the task into smaller, more manageable chunks. Does the child act out during transitions? Give them a heads-up before changing activities, so they have time to mentally prepare.
8. Teach Self-Regulation Skills
This one is huge and often overlooked. Teachers can directly teach kids how to manage their own emotions and behaviors. Model self-regulation strategies like deep breathing or using a “calm-down corner” when they feel overwhelmed. Help kids recognize when they’re getting frustrated and offer strategies to cool down before they disrupt the class. Sometimes, it’s as simple as teaching them to ask for a break when they need one.
9. Collaborate with Parents and Specialists
Teachers shouldn’t have to do this alone. If a student’s disruptive behavior is persistent, reach out to the parents and any specialists (like school counselors or special education teachers). There might be underlying issues, like undiagnosed learning disabilities or anxiety, that are driving the behavior. A collaborative approach with input from home and school will get better results than going it solo.
The bottom line? Managing disruptive behavior is about supporting the child, not controlling them. When teachers approach the situation with empathy and proactive strategies, they can help the child (and the whole classroom) thrive.
Emptying the Classroom
My younger son’s classroom was emptied many times in elementary school.
The ole’ “clear the classroom” strategy. This is one of those things schools sometimes default to when a child is having a significant behavioral issue, and while it can be necessary in some extreme cases, it definitely shouldn’t be the go-to move every time a kid is struggling. Let’s break it down.
1. Is Emptying the Classroom Necessary?
In some rare cases, yes, it can be necessary—particularly if a student is acting aggressively in a way that poses a genuine safety risk to others. Think situations where a child is physically violent, throwing objects, or is so dysregulated that they can’t be de-escalated safely in the moment. The idea here is to protect the other students while giving the child some space to calm down. But—and this is a big but—it should only be used as a last resort when other de-escalation strategies have failed. If clearing the classroom is happening frequently, something is very, very wrong with the support system for that student.
2. Do Schools Have to Empty the Classroom?
No, schools don’t have a legal obligation to empty the classroom every time there’s a behavior issue. In fact, it’s not even considered a best practice in behavior management. The law (IDEA) focuses on creating a safe and appropriate learning environment for all students, and that includes managing behaviors in a way that’s least disruptive to the whole class. Schools are supposed to use positive behavior interventions and supports (PBIS) first—things like sensory breaks, behavior plans, and teaching coping skills. Emptying the classroom is more of a last-ditch effort, not a legal requirement.
3. What’s the Problem with Using This Strategy Too Often?
There are a few issues here. First, it can isolate the child who is struggling, making them feel like the problem every time something goes wrong. That can increase anxiety, shame, and make it harder for them to re-engage with learning. Second, it disrupts the entire classroom, which isn’t fair to the other students or the teacher. Kids pick up on patterns, so if they see that one student’s behavior always leads to the whole class leaving, it can create resentment or even increase the likelihood that the child will act out again.
Third, frequent classroom evacuations signal that the behavior plan isn’t working. If you’re having to clear the room often, it means the child isn’t getting the support they need to manage their behavior appropriately. In that case, it’s time to sit down with the IEP team and re-evaluate what’s going on. Maybe the behavior intervention plan (BIP) isn’t sufficient, or maybe the child needs more support—like a one-on-one aide, sensory tools, or even a functional behavior assessment (FBA) to figure out the root cause of the behavior.
4. Better Alternatives
Instead of defaulting to emptying the classroom, schools should be looking at preventative and proactive measures. Some alternatives include:
- Calm-down corners: A designated space in the classroom where the child can go to self-regulate when they’re feeling overwhelmed.
- Sensory breaks: Allowing the child to step out of the room for a few minutes to reset with a calming activity.
- Behavior plans: A solid behavior plan should include specific, positive strategies that teach the child better ways to cope, rather than just reacting when things go wrong.
- De-escalation techniques: Teachers and staff should be trained in how to recognize early signs of distress and intervene before things escalate to the point of needing to clear the room.
5. When It Is Necessary
Now, if things escalate to a point where the child’s behavior becomes dangerous and immediate intervention is required, emptying the room may be the safest choice. But this should come with a clear follow-up plan. What’s the next step? How will the situation be handled once the room is cleared? Will the child receive support from a crisis team or a counselor? How will we prevent this from happening again? Clearing the classroom isn’t a solution; it’s a temporary measure to keep kids safe. The real work has to happen after the fact, ensuring the child gets the support they need so it doesn’t happen again.
In a nutshell, clearing the classroom should be the exception, not the rule. Schools don’t have to do it, but if they’re resorting to it regularly, something is broken in the behavior plan, and it’s time to re-evaluate what’s really going on with that student’s support.
